Looking at what has been happening....

I am a few days off the end of my holidays, before the start of the next stage of my career move, and so I thought I would do a review of what I have achieved in preparation for this year.

Actually I am amazed at how much has happened in a relatively short time; and all since I last wrote this blog.

I think my happiest achievement this week has been to have buyers for three of my paintings. I believe this has been the direct result of changing my marketing approach to my artwork. Also part of changing my approach has been to move into a new weekly art group and make lovely new friends. Now I am developing more confidence and appreciation for the direction my painting is trying to achieve. Also we laugh together, work together and encourage each others painting, disasters, successes and selling efforts. I like this kind of group energy where we are all working together to recognise our unique and successful approaches to our work as successful artists. So exciting!

So the studio has had a thorough clean and sort out in preparation for upcoming artwork before I start Teachers training next week. I moved in a desk for an area to prepare and send the pieces to go out into the world. Sure has made a significant difference having this desk as a space to have a more professional approach.

The new fence is very finished and already covered in creepers, and the vegetable garden is producing lovely salad vegetables, as are the other walls around. All the wonderful product of the wet weather.

My son is now in his own space (a caravan) as this is his last year at school before leaving and starting tertiary education. He now has a bedroom and a living room with a fridge and able to have friends to visit.

He certainly made it happen too, as he got two of his friends to help him empty the driveway of the winter wood and stack it into the woodshed to clear space to put the caravan. So all the winter wood in stacked and dry.

Now I have a guestroom in the house for family and friends to stay. There is a possibility it may be used for a boarder too in the future. This is after the cleaning and before the making of the bed. I will put a wooden blind up for the window too.



The other thing I have started and always wanted to do, is to put sayings and expressions that catch my fancy on to the toilet wall for comtemplation. Well I took the step and started writing on the wall. So much fun.

And to top all this off, I found a pair of reading glasses, when I was cleaning out the studio, which I had bought so long ago but were too strong to wear. ow they are perfect and I can see again. And they are a better quality than the ones I had been wearing.

Gosh life is good.

What is this very weird spider....??

I found this spider on me this morning, it's so tiny and ...I have never seen one before..... I'm wondering what it is???  Anyone know

Twilight Movie, thoughts after seeing it...

Well I think Twilight beats Avatar hands down for a story which evolves male female relationships. And I understand now why everyone young is so excited by it.  It restores the balance of power between men and women.

To see a man who comes from a the idea that he wants to protect a woman, and works so hard at maintaining self control as his responsibility for himself, to have a relationship with her, certainly presents a contrast to the image of men as macho comic figures with a sensitive side that women need to be strong and protect.

And such a pleasure to see these ideals so strongly held that sexuality as sex acts are not featured, which regenerates the soul and revives the idea of a woman, who lives into her vast emotional sensual feelings with a man, can be safe and grow into an awakened woman.

Now I feel like something inside of me has been restored and understood as a woman.

the farmer's market and Avatar.

I have just been to the Farmer's market across the road from my house,  and sampled delicious little treats like gormet food, dried meats, chocolate, chicken balls, all yum but I really went for a shot of wheat grass juice. I curious about this stuff. I had a shot last weekend and it tasted terrible, so I thought this week have it in a freshly made juice. So with a topicina in hand..that's mixed fruit...I put the shot into it....sigh still tasted terrible and the juice sure lost that yummy flavour......so I will persurive and see how it goes..I think a month of two.

As you can see it's really really hot, and everyone is under the shade of the trees. A cool 36C on my back porch.

I also went to the market to get some more plants for my garden...this time it was herbs. Now the fence is finished I feel like I can really start filling the place up with plants. Bought a fresh cheese and herb bread too.

Went with Daughter and saw the Movie Avatar last night. Unreal. What struck me most strongly was the same unlying thread of the ideas in the Anne Caffery books about dragons bonding  humans, and the Dance with Wolves with the soldier becoming a member of the Native American Indian tribes,  was interwoven in this movie...great movie, and a very strong message about plundering other cultures and disregard for the living earth. Very well done for that.

my new year's resolution

Is to wake up each day and know I will decide to be happy.....

My daughter sent me this and it's working.......THE BANK ACCOUNT!!!  

  This  is AWESOME ... something we should all  remember.  

  A  92-year-old, petite, well-poised and proud man,  who is fully dressed each    morning  by eight o'clock , with his hair fashionably  combed and shaved    perfectly,  even though he is legally blind, moved to a  nursing home today.  

  His  wife of 70 years recently passed away, making  the move necessary. After    many  hours of waiting patiently in the lobby of the  nursing home, he smiled    sweetly  when told his room was  ready.  

 

 As he maneuvered his walker to the elevator, I provided a visual description  of his tiny room, including the eyelet sheets that had been hung over his window.
    

  I love it,' he stated with the enthusiasm of an eight-year-old having just   been presented with a new puppy.  

  Mr.  Jones, you haven't seen the room; just  wait.'  

  'That  doesn't have anything to do with it,' he  replied.  

  Happiness  is something you decide on ahead of  time.  

  Whether  I like my room or not doesn't depend on how the  furniture is    arranged  ... it's how I arrange my mind. I already  decided to love it.  

 'It's  a decision I make every morning when I wake up.  I have a choice;  

  I  can spend the day in bed recounting the  difficulty I have with  the    parts  of my body that no longer work, or get out of  bed and be thankful    for  the ones that do.  

  Each  day is a gift, and as long as my eyes open, I'll  focus on the new day    and  all the happy memories I've stored away. Just  for this time in my life.  

  Old  age is like a bank account. You withdraw from it what you've put in.  

  So,  my advice to you would be to deposit a lot of  happiness in the bank    account  of memories!  

  

Thank  you for your part in filling my Memory  Bank.  

  I  am still depositing.  

  'Remember  the five simple rules to be  happy:  

  
1.  Free your heart from  hatred.  

  
2.  Free your mind from worries.  

  
3.  Live simply.  

  
4.  Give more.  

 
5.  Expect less.  

  

You will receive a miracle tomorrow.  

  Now, STOP! Did you hear what I just said. You WILL receive a miracle  

  Tomorrow.  So send it right now!  

I send this to all those who read my blog, ....and now everyday I wake up and think yes I am happy to today and life is wonderful, cos it is my attitude that makes the difference........how easy is that!

anger followed by guilt and feeling sorry for the person I am angry with.

This thought occurred to me as I completed the word finder and using many coloured pens to reveal pretty patterns when all the words are found. So in the process of looking for patterns I am looking for the pattern of anger and being true to oneself and stop this feeling guilty for the other person...as it just victimises them  and me.........so the pattern and the resolution.....

When I am angry, I feel the anger and then, after I have said what I wanted to say to that person, I feel guilty and sorry for the person who I was angry with......this really boosts my sense of self worth...YEAH RIGHT!!!!.....I think this is fear of the repecussions of being angry. As a child being angry in face of the authority figure was very firmly discouraged. And if I am too scared to really say what I want to say, I just continue to feel angry and then if I say anything to someone else about what I am angry about with that person, then I feel really guilty for saying not nice things about that person.......  SOOOOOOO...new years resolution...... to be true to my values to be ok with being angry, cos anger is a very healing emotion. I suppose I hold onto anger because I feel strong when I am angry and when the emotion subsides it is replaced with a woobly feeling inside. The woobly feeling is "this is the end; there is no more future cos I don't see how to stand strong in my anger, say what I want to say and still feel safe, only way to feel safe is to escape and hide".

Feeling sorry for the other person ...hmmm.... as I write this an expression comes to mind from my past..."this is going to hurt me more than it's going to hurt you"....I feel rightous anger just thinking about the pain that was inflicted and justified with that statement. Hmmmm......so I suspect it is an act of power to withdraw in face of that pain, but I want to stand tall as an act of power and live my life with pride and respect and deal with my anger as a process of negotiation and have a strong voice.

To have a strong voice that gives and produces a sense of safety for others and myself even iwhen feeling the anger. This is the art form.

So am reading Bravemouth, Living with Billy Connolly, by Pamela Stephenson.

I love the way he is so strong in his exterior self (I love his clothes) and he can say "fuck" in the nicest possible way......

I want to dreadlock my hair, dye the ends purple and green, and get a tattoo that says "Theodore is short, fat and wearing green on his sleeve" scripted in Punjabi.....I think!!!

follow up to "you get me"

Still thinking about this feeling of "you get me" and I suppose I would also say it is two people "reading between each other's lines"...

I have been having a unexpected break from the youngest daughter over the last two nights, she's staying at her dads. Strange being alone but good, as it gives me the opportunity to realise the circle of my life is changing with the importance of activities changing emphasis. By that I mean, I have moved into a new circle of friends, and becoming a strong part of the New art club I have become involved in. It has been a gradual and comfortable change with a sense of acceptance and a feeling of a new way of being a friend. The sense of back and forth sharing and support and we work together with our art has been amazing. Quite a surprise actually because it happened so gradually and with no apparent drama. Now a member has an opening this coming week, after leaving work to pursue art as a fulltime job. So we are all very excited to support his first independant opening. To admire another's artwork and to get the same kind of admiration back for my artwork has been very humbling and has changed my feeling of being a successful artist making artwork and the incentive to create for exhibition and sale.

New years eve today and the last day of 2009. I have mowed all the lawns and tidied the edges with a sense of prpeparing for the New year. The sun is also shining and not too hot thank goodness. The predicted gale was a lot of hot wind and only a touch of rain, so today is a beautiful day. My plants are still alive and will start growing soon as I nurture them along.

New Year's resolutions. Hmmmm....I want to get up each saturday morning and do the gardening. I love gardening, it is so visual but I know this is a real hard one cos on saturdays all I want to do is blob and read the paper over a coffee. I want to take over the lawns from the son cos I love mowing the lawns and he hates it. And then I can keep the garden in the state I enjoy instead of having a fight over wheither the lawn is done or not when he wants to go out!